Journal from my 35th birthday: March 14 2023

Today, the universe smiled upon 'me, gracing the world with a canvas of blue skies, where the bright sun reigned, giving a warm

Everyone who rested  beneath its radiant glow. It was a day of unreal beauty, light and warmth that enveloped the world in its gentle hug —a day that felt as if it had been touched by the hand of gods or the universe. 

As I stepped outside into the sun, I felt a sense of wonder wash over me—a feeling of awe at the sheer magnificence of the world around me. The air was alive with the gentle breeze, carrying with it the sweet scent of blooming flowers and the promise of new beginnings. Spring is here and we all deserve it! 

With each breath, I felt a sense of peace settle over me, a tranquility you only feel of the knowledge that even in the darkest of times, there is still beauty to be found, still joy to be shared. And as I laid in the warmth of the sun's rays, I felt Benji's presence all around me—a whisper on the wind, a kiss of sunlight upon my skin.

Throughout the day, as I went about my routines and rituals, I carried with me the memory of this beautiful day—a sign of light in the darkness, a reminder of the beauty and wonder of the world around us. And as evening came and the sky had the most beautiful sunset I found myself filled with gratitude—for the gift of another day, for the love that surrounds me, and for the memory of Benji, whose spirit continues to shine brightly in the hearts of all who knew him.

As I close my eyes with mixed emotions: grief for my baby boy Benji and my dreams of our family’s future I am at the same time filed with  love and remembrance, I give thanks for the beauty of this day—for the sun that warmed my skin, the breeze that whispered through the trees, and the love that fills my heart. And though the day may come to an end, the memory of its beauty will linger on—a timeless reminder of the enduring power of love and the beauty of life itself.